<body> ?my light will shine when all else fade.
...the girl, JOAN.




*I love the city life, but I'll always be a small town girl at heart.

*I never regret a thing, it's a wasted emotion

*I live life to the fullest each day. I've seen that life is just too short not to take chances.

*I am outgoing and i do crazy stuff especially when i'm with my friends

*I love taking pictures and writing on my blog so that someday, I can say these words to myself:
"..I have lived a happy life."

*I don't let things bother me or get in my way..I will succeed because I know I will.

*I am a risk-taker; what's the sense of making mistakes if you can't learn from them?

*Nothing could go wrong if I just follow my heart

*What doesn't kill you will make you stronger and tougher.

*-AD ASTRA PER ASPERA-; TO THE STARS, THROUGH DIFFICULTIES*



This is ME. Like me or Hate me. Either way this is my page and you chose to be in here.

that's all i can say...just read my posts to know more about me


...MY DESIRES


This is my page so please behave here!

Constructive Comments are very much appreciated

If you can't follow my SIMPLE rules here...better leave and do your own thing.

enjoy your stay!!!

___ JOAN ___

...OUR GOSSIPS



...FALLING STAR


I wished upon a shooting star Falling to it's death
 My wish came true
It brought me to you
 But only to show me
 Just to share with me
What I can't have
 I am like a star
 Flickering in the night
 One minute you make me feel so right
 The next second I run away
 Afraid of being happy
 I am an angel with a broken wing
 I hide it with a mask
 I have so many deep wounds
 I have been scared
 It is not my fault that I am this way
 He did it to me
 He cut me so deep
 There's so much hurt inside
 I have hidden it well
 But my heart has been torn
 I feel like Hell
 Please heal my wounds
 Help me to love you
 I already do
 but help me to stay by your side
 Before I fall to my lonely death
 Just like the star that brought me to you

***

...CONNECTIONS
Bestfriend Marielle

Lara Desiree

Cindy

Roseann

Fei

Kei

Gagay

Athina

Grazie

Akisha

Joan

Kim

Bestfriend Medz

Trisha

Sherilyn

Lara

Clayton State University

St. Philip Benizi Catholic Church

University of Santo Tomas

Quezon City Academy

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    •

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    Friday, February 24, 2006


    Recollection
    As I promised, ikukwento ko na sa inyo yung experience ko sa Recollection namin...

    I've been in Antipolo before but I never thought I would be in this place. The retreat center was a very peaceful and paradise-like place. At first, I thought it was just an ordinary trip. No cellphone. No music. But at least, I'm with my friends.

    We had an orientation with Kuya Alfred. He's such a nice and super kalog guy. Para siyang comedian sa isang gag show. Nakakatuwa. Siguro kung nakilala ko siya sa labas ng retreat center, hindi ako maniniwala na he entered the world of priesthood. He discussed about the guidelines and rules to follow. I'm so excited. I want to start this activity as soon as possible.

    We had our snack. Ang sarap ng suman. First time ko na kumain nito kasama ang classmates at teachers ko. After nun, nulinis namin yung table. Tapos, pinagpahinga muna kami sa room namin. Nakakatuwa kasi matutulog kaming mga Escoda girls sa iisang room. My bed was located near the door and my duty (according to our adviser, Mrs. Dimaano) is to make sure that no boys will come in on our room. Tahimik yung place Sa sobrang tahimik nga, kinikilabutan ako.

    Nag-bell na, which means we have to go to the session hall. When we got there, pinagdrawing kami ni Kuya Alfred. We have to draw something which symbolizes ourselves. I myself draw a leaf that I think the best thing that symbolizes me.

    We took our lunch. Hindi ko alam kung anong tawag dun sa ulam pero okay lang naman. After lunch, nagkaroon kami ng activity. In-explain naming kung bakit yun yung napili namin na isimbolo sa sarili.

    Here is mine:

    "Dahon yung napili ko kasi tulad ng dahon, alam kong kahit saan man ako dalhin ng pagkakataon, kakayanin ko basta nandyan ang hangin. Ang hangin ang sumisimbolo sa mga mahal ko sa buhay. Alam kong kakayanin ko ang kahit na anong trial basta nandyan sila, sa tabi ko."

    Sorry, nakalimutan ko na yung ibang sinabi ko. Pero meron pa palang ibang ipinalagay sa amin. 5 NEGATIVE ATTITUDE and 5 POSITIVE ATTITUDE.

    Here's mine:

    5 NEGATIVE:
    * Selfish
    * matigas ang ulo
    * maingay
    * pakilamera
    * moody

    5 POSITIVE:
    * maaasahan
    * open-minded
    * friendly
    * masayahin
    * honest


    After that, kain na naman. Kuntsinta (tama ba ung spelling?) yung kinain namin. Naglnis na naman kami ng table and then, umakyat sa room. Pahinga daw muna. Nakipagkwentuhan ako sa friends ko. Nakatulog ako. Di ko alam kung ilng oras ako natulog(sa tingin ko sandali lang yun). Nagprepare na ako kasi alam ko na marami pa kaming activities. Ang ingay ng boys kasi sabay-sabay silang naligo.


    Bumalik kami sa session hall. Nagkaroon ng activity kung saan ibibigay namin ung kandila sa taong gusto naming magthank you or sorry. I cried. After that, dinner na. In fairness, ang sarap ng ulam. Nakakatuwa kasi tinatawag naming NANAY si Carlyn. Siya kasi yung naglalagay ng pagkain sa plate namin. Ang bait din nila Peter at Krista kasi nilalagayn nila ng water yung baso ko.

    After nun, I took a bath tapos bumalik na kami sa session hall Nagdrawing kami ng kamay and answered some questions... here's mine:

    Greatest gift from God: Life
    Source of strength: God
    Persons/things that you treasure most:     Family
    Greatest fear in life: Death
    Darkest part of my life:     secret na lang muna kasi masyadong personal

    Pinaghiwa-hiwalay kami ni kuya Alfred. I'm in group no. 3 together with Krista, Paul, Ruth, Richard, Gerhart, Aiko and Trisha. May kasama kami para mag-guide sa amin. We form a circle and pray. Nagpakilala si kuya Val. He's a seminarian (if that's the right word for that) and taking up philosophy. We shared some stories. May nakaka-iyak. May nakakatawa. May nakakatakot. Dati akala ko kilalang-kilala ko na ung mga classmates ko dahil araw-araw ko silang nakakasama pero hindi pala. Marami pa pla akong hindi alam tungkol sa kanila. At dati, akala ko din na kaiangan ng mahabang panahon para LUBUSANG makilala ang isang tao pero nagkamali ako. Tulad ni kuya Val na sandali lang namin nakasama pero parang kilalang-kilala na namin sya. I'm grateful to meet such a wonderful person like him and I'm looking forward to see him again. SANA...

    Isa-isa kaming nagshare kung bakit un yung mga answer namin dun sa mga question sa taas. Isa-isa rin kaming nagconfess ng mga kasalanan namin sa isang priest and pinapunta kami sa chapel. Nakakatakot sa chapel kasi mag-isa lang ako at meron pang kakaibang ingay. Bumalik na ako dun sa group ko.

    Ayoko munang matapos yung moment nay un kasi feeling ko, the more na nag-uusap-usap kami, the more na nagiging malapit kami sa bawat isa. I enjoyed listening to them as if it will never happen again.
    Ang ganda ng pala ng view. Very solemn. May candle effect with matching banig pa. honestly, ayoko pang matapos un kasi matutulog na. Ayoko ko pa kasi may nagpaparamdam daw dun sa place. Wala naman akong nakita dun pero may iba akong feeling. Yung feeling na someone's watching over you. Bahala na...

    Bumalik na kami sa session hall at nakilala namin si kuya Carl (seminarian din). Sabi niya, kung sinong inaantok... pwede nang lmabas at matulog. Pero walang lumabas. He let us close our eyes and meditate us. Pinatay nila yung ilaw. Nung una hindi ako naiiyak pero nung nagtagal na, humagulhol na kami. I guess all the girls cried pero di ako sure kung lhat ng boys ay umiyak din. Namaga yata yung mata namin. After nun, pinatulog na kami. Nakatulog ako agad kasi kaka-iyak ko lang. Kahit maingay ung ibang girls, nakatulog pa rin ako. Ilang beses akong nagising. Putol-putol yung tulog ko.


    Maaga kaming nagising. Wala pa yung bell, naligo na kami. Ayoko yatang mahuli sa pagligo. Inayos ko na yung bag ko. Nagbell na kaya bumaba na kami sa session hall. Pinagawa kami ng sulat for our parents tpos nagbreakfast na kami. Pagbalik naming sa session hall, nagkaroon ng mass. Binigyan kami ng candle after nung mass. Pinatay yung iaw at isa-isa naming sinindihan. Makipagpalitan daw kami ng candle at magbigay ng message sa isa't isa. Umiyak na naman kami. Natanggap namin ung letter from our parents. Sabi ni kuya Alfred, itago daw namin yung candle at sulat para remembrance.


    Nagpaalam na kami kay kuya Alfred at nagbigay ng message sa min yung adviser namin.

    Umuwi kaming masaya... sana makabalik ulit ako dun. Para kasing pagbabalik loob yun kay God. Ang gaan ng pakiramdam. Sana lahat ng tao makapunta dun at ma-experience din yung ginawa namin. Isa yun sa pinakamemorabe na nangyari sa buhay ko at hinding-hindi ko yun makakalimutan.

    jOaN :)

    SMILE...you're with me!